This is one of my favourite photos of my stepfather, my mother’s second husband. I have written about him before, but as today would have been his 93rd birthday I thought I would celebrate it a bit, and show you one or two things that I have found.

The photo is one of two portraits he had taken at the same time – the other one he is smiling more, not something he did a lot of on a day to day basis, but I prefer him here in serious mode. Here I believe he had just graduated – but there do not seem to be any actual graduation photographs. Perhaps he did not want one – he was always a bit different, and very modest.

The letter below from his professor seems to prove his modesty. He never spoke about it, just kept it folded up in a small envelope together with some family photos, which he never actually showed me either.

The uphill journey must refer to the fact that he completed his degree without having completed his formal ecucation in any traditional way. When he came to England ( in about 1944 ) to join his father, who was part of the Polish Government in Exile, he was sent to St Edmund’s College in Ware, which he hated. Up till then he had spent the war in Romania, then Cyprus, and war time England, in boarding school must have been miserable. He had little English to begin with, but fortunately that did not remain an obstacle for long. Soon it was perfect, though with a heavy accent. (that was surprising , as he was very musical!) Anyway he hated the school and after a year he persuaded his father that he should leave. His father agreed on condition that he went to work so he did. He joined the Red Cross as an administrator, and also did various portering jobs to earn money. I imagine his parents were not delighted about the situation, but I never met his father, who died the year I was born, and his mother just loved him. By the time I met her, the follies of his youth were long forgiven!

After a few gruelling months of hard physical work I think he came to the conclusion that perhaps higher education may be a good idea, and so he did his matriculation certificate at night school and then went to the LSE. He did not enjoy the course very much, but I remember him saying that he knew Bernard Levin, and as I was a great fan of his writing, I was very impressed. Sadly, he did not know Levin well enough to have kept in contact with him after his degree.

But this letter confirms that he received some sort of cash prize. I wonder what he spent it on. By the time he married my mother he had no real interest in money for money’s sake. He earned a lot, and spent a lot- mainly on my mother and when the fancy took him, on anyone who seemed ot need his help. All of which would have been fine, if, at the height of his success as a timber agent ( there wasn’t anything he didn’t know about plywood – you couldn’t pass a hoarding without being told its origin and price per cubic foot!) he had done his expenses. Countless business dinners and flights were paid for out of the family coffers – I can’t say that my mother never complained – she did – but it seemed that filling in those forms was too much for him.

Never mind. The portrait is the only picture I have seen of him wearing a tie. He always wore bow ties, and one of my fondest memories is of him helping my husband tie one when we first met. He was a fascinating man, who was extremely knowledgeable about all sorts of things, especially history, which is what he wanted to study before he was diverted to whatever he actually got his degree in. I must search for his certificate!